Halloween Costume Ideas

There are many commercial costumes available at the local stores, however between the cost, and lack of imagination, and the fact you end up with a half dozen kids all looking the same at a party. Nothing beats homemade. Below is some basic ideas for you to play with. All are cheap, easy, and allow for tons of imagination.

The old stand by a Ghost

Grab a old white sheet, cut out the eyes. Be sure its is short enough not to trip you. Take scrap piece of sheet, and sew up a simple treat bag. Why be the same old plain ghost? A ghost going out in public might like to get dressed up a little. Use the same old white sheet, cut out holes for the eyes and a small slit for the mouth. Then dress it up a little. Put eye shadow and lashes around the eyes. Lipstick for the mouth. Put a little color on the cheeks. How about earrings and a necklace ? You could color in a beard or mustache. Use something besides just a white sheet to be a little more fancy

Clown

Sweet clothes that are too large. Decorate by using either fabric paint, or markers. For those who dare try tie-die. Tack on some large pop-poms, add a cheap wig, hat, and make-up. You may also stuff the extra space in clothing with tissue. However this could be messy, if you need to make a "pit-stop".

Scarecrow:

Over sized flannel shirt, faded blue jeans with patches, rope for belt and to tie at the cuffs of his jeans and sleeves, stuff the shirt and jeans with plastic grocery, or paper, a little bit of straw to hang out of jeans and shirt. Add a little bit of make-up.


The American tourist:

Guys loud Hawaii shirt, shorts (if weather permits), Large straw hat. Gals bright loud dress, flats, big sun hat, straw bag. Don't forget to have a camera, and maps hanging out, and that look of being lost. Guys can use a tourist bag, (like you get from travel agents, and gals can use the straw bag for their treats.


1960s Hippy

This one is hard, after all its all back in style! What is real, and what is costume? ;-) Tie die clothing, long wig (in the old days we called a "fall", sandals, headband, anything with fringe on it (vests, purse...) light colored sun glasses.


Old man

Dark paints (cuffed), and jacket, most any dress shirt, mans flannel hat, walking cane. Gray the hair, with any of the commercial temporary colors, or dust with a little flour.


Old woman

Old style dress, just below knee, knee-hi stockings rolled down a little, oxfords, large black purse.

Your chance to be a real nerd. Slick back the hair, grab some paints that are too short, white shirt, white socks, penny loafers, or lace up oxfords, pocket protector, with lots of pens, dark rim glasses (don't forget to tape the corner, or at least paper clip it) briefcase, or backpack for treat bag.


Japanese Doll

My daughter won with this costume! Her face was painted white, she had red rosy cheeeks all shaped in a circle, Hair in buns, thoung slippers, and a kimono.

Miss. America
Use a old bridesmaid dress of formal, add a pair of gloves, a tiara, some oversized jewelry, and heals. For the banner, a piece of wide ribbon, and write "Miss. America" in glitter.


Soda pop can

Use a round barrel, cut a hole in the bottom. You cut holes for arms and your head. Paint it the colors of a pop can. Presto! You have a pop can!!!


Static Cling

Wear anything a solid color is good all white or all black. With safety
pins pin anything to yourself i:e: socks, underware, bounce sheets, etc. You can also spray your hair straight up in the air.

1950’s “Sock-Hopper”
It’s quite simple, just a round skirt, a white short-sleeved shirt, and some saddle shoes. (If you don’t have saddle shoes, plain buckle shoes are fine.) You could add some cat-eye glasses if you want. Tie their hair in a ponytail, and wrap a scarf around it.

Mummy
Wrap yourself in white bandages (rolls of gauze) Use splotches of green paint for "mold". Use white make-up on face with "age lines" drawn on. The stiff-legged gait works perfectly.

Quasimodo the Hunchback of Notre Dame
Build the "hunchback" out of foam or cardboard. Find an old coat several sizes too large to accomodate this. Old, ratty clothes are great! Wear a snaggly wig and keep putting hand up to ear and muttering "eh?".

Pirate
Form a fake aooden leg by wrapping your bad one in brown felt. Wear sailor pants or jeans with a striped top. Tie a bandana around your head, wear an eye patch, carry an empty bottle marked XXX (for the "rum") and mutter "aargh" a lot. Ask for "Trick or treat, matey!"

Crash test dummy - After! There is a commercial costume for this, but a good one can be made with sweats and tape to make the markings on it like the crash test dummies. Use bandages and fake blood to decorate. Fashion a seat belt out of webbing and an old buckle and pin in place. (or go to a junk yard as ask for an old seatbelt).

Train Engineer
A pair of blue jeans, a blue Jean jacket, a red and black bandana. a blue and white engineer hat, a whistle, and play lantern.


Skunk
Black with white strip down the pack.. be careful everyone may run

Bunny
Pink, brown, or white, add a powder puff or large pom-pom to the backside, and a set of ears make from constriction paper and a plastic headband. Now just hop on out and enjoy

Turtle
Green with a piece of poster board attached to the back. Simple cut the poster board into a large oval, make random marks like a turtle shell, and paint.

Puppy

Brown, tan or white, either paint, or pin paper spots on. Make floppy ears and bobby pin to hair over your ears. The tale can be most anything, depending on what type of doggie you wish to be. Add a little make-up.

Kitten
Gold, brown, tan, white. Make ears from construction paper, attach to head band or bobby pin in to hair. Sew a simple round tale, and pin on.

Spider
Black, For the legs grab some cheap black hose, stuff with any thing dark and light weight. Either sew, or staple to keep stuffing from falling out. Pin to clothing, add a little make-up


Lady Bug
Use a pair of black sweats and black sweat shirt (and a pair of black shoes). Use a large piece of poster board or cardboard and cut out a large oval. Paint it red with black dots. Staple black elastic pieces (in a loop) onto the board to make arm holes. For the antenna atatch craft pipe cleaners with black pom poms on the ends to a headband. From: Shaundi Gopp

Snowman
Last year my 3 year old was a snowman. It was the easiest costume so far! I bought white sweats, christmas socks, white keds tennis shoes, a cheap black hat, fake snow, mittens, scarf and black pom poms for the coal!
I sprayed the hat to look like snow and added a cheap red bird from the craft store. I bought a white mask and bought a cheap carrot from the craft store and glued it onto the nose part of the mask. I glued the pompoms on his sweatshirt and that was it. Cheap, simple and he was adorable. Besides he was the only frosty we saw! He also had to have white face makeup on!! From: Andee Heneghan

Cereal Killer
Attach little cereal boxes to a shirt, cut a slit in the boxes, glue in plastic knives into the holes, drip red paint running down from the knife hole in the box. From:Gail McNitt

A Bunch of Grapes
Using green or pruple sweets, attach balloons of the same color with safety pins. Ppaint face and hands same color. From: Barbara Brown

My fav was purple tights, purple (long sleeves) body suit (I can't think of what it's really called), 12 purple balloons and a green felt hat. Balloons are pinned (by the tied off end to the fabric in a triangle shape, 3 on top, 2 in middle and 1 at bottom (on front and back). I was a bunch of grapes and the hit of the party!

Black Eye Pea
When I was younger, a teacher from my elementary school dressed up as a "black eyed pea" and it was so cute, my mother dressed me up the same way the next year. It is simple and cheap. Wearing all white, with black tennis shoes, I cut out the letter 'P' from black construction paper and pinned the P's all over the white outfit. I painted a black spot over one eye ("black eye" ... get it? :) hee hee) and I was a "black-eyed 'P' " From: Angela

Black Bat
Using a black umbrella and tights, Rip the umbrella in half. Discard the center and innards of the umbrella. If you are fancy you can sew the edges of the umbrella to the back of the body. If you don't have the time or patients to sew the umbrella you can always safety pin it. From: Sydhen


Butterfly
Put on black sweats and black shoes. Use a piece of poster board and paint wanted color cut them out in an appropriate wing shape. punch two holes toward the edges of the wings. put black ribbon through them and tie around waist. attach pipe cleaners and pompoms to a plastic head band. From: Bekjg

Blooming Idiot!
Get a green body suit and some green tights and on your head wear a beanie hat. Glue fake flowers to the beanie hat and maybe pin a few on your body suit. Also it's fun if you paint some flowers on your face and arms. I found some cheap, fake Ivy and wrapped it around my neck and arms and presto! Your a
blooming idiot! From: Kym Tucker

Spider to Bat
You need an oversized black sweatshirt, black sweat pants, black open faced ski mask, two HUGE googly eyes, black yarn or fishing line, pipe insulation (for legs!), three pairs of gloves (very small) and black opaque tights.
Attached the ski mask to the neck of the sweatshirt. Hot glue googly eyes over the opening in the ski mask, The foam pipe insulation is placed into tights. So that the "leg" could bend, I cut the length of pipe insulation in half. Attach all legs together for coordinated movement with black yarn or (fishing line), Attach toddlers gloves on the ends of the "legs" and have your child wear one pair. For safety, I bought some reflective tape and created a "design" on the back and front so that he could be seen. Obviously, wear black sweat pants and dark shoes. Two years later, we took the legs off, added a huge set of black felt wings hot glued from wrist to neckline to wrist and used craft foam to make big black bat ears!! From: Amy

Darcy Prairiedog
Items needed: Light and dark pink felt , an old hooded pink sweatcoat, pink gloves, pink slacks, pink slippers.
Cut out light pink felt into what looks like prairiedog ears. Place the dark pink felt inside in in the same shape except smaller. Glue onto the sides of the hood on the sweatcoat. With the remaining felt,cut out a piece of "headfur". From the light pink felt. Put on and paint your face pink with a black nose. From: Patricia

Ragdoll
One year for my girls I had them dress up as ragdolls and I didnt have to spend a penny!
I took an old sleeper and cut out the feet then I sewed patches in various places over the sleeper. I also sewed wide cuffs at wrist and ankles. (because the sleepers were to small). It looked so cute. For the head I used an old stocking cap and sewed strips of fabric from old clothes to the stocking cap. Then gave them red cheeks and freckles. It was a great costume and completely free. From: Evelyn

Basket of laundry...clean or dirty.
Wear sweat pants and sweatshirt if it is cold. Tights and a turtleneck if you will be in a warm building. Take an inexpensive (thin) plastic laundry basket and cut a hole in the bottom that you can fit through. Make it small enough so that is "sits" on your hips after you pull it over your head. Fill basket with laundry and pin a few dryer softener sheets to your sweatshirt.From: Dede

Bubble Bath
Take a white laundry basket and cut out the bottom, be sure to tape the cut edges with masking tape. Attach two wide strips of material (white) to front and back of basket (these are the shoulder straps). Attach white, light peach, and pearl balloons to the staps using safety pins (these are bubbles) Wear a white bodysuit, and white pantyhose. Put on your houseshoes, shower cap, and grab your scrub brush. (If the laundry basket has holes in it, cover the inside with posterboard) From: Bridgette




Myspace Graphics, Halloween Graphics at WishAFriend.com



Myspace Graphics, Halloween Graphics at WishAFriend.com




Myspace Comments, Halloween Comments at WishAFriend.com

Fashion

Women’s Hoodies

A “hoodie” is a sweatshirt with a hood. The hood is the most distinctive characteristic besides its frontal pocket, drawstring (adjusts the opening of hood), and zipper closure. This garment became popular in the 70’s during the start of the hip hop culture. It became even more widely recognized in the 90’s when a champion boxerwas wearing this garment during the iconic blockbuster hit “Rocky”. This piece of clothing has been a wardrobe staple for all kinds of people, whether we’rewearing tennis shoes or heels. No matter our age or gender, we all deserve to get comfy in a good hoodie. But how can a woman dress up a hoodie without looking like a teenybopper? See below for some tips on how to make a hoodie fashionable:

Boots

All boots were made for walking…

If you take a good look into my shoe collection, you’ll find endless pairs of boots. A woman can never have enough shoes… inside my shoe closet (yes, I turned a linen closet into my shoe sanctuary!) you will find different versions of the “boot”. Some of my “boot-y treasures” are my gray ultra-suede ankle boots, black equestrian and patent leather boots, faux-croc wedge knee highs, and motorcycle studded to the festive star spangled western boot (which have been in the back of my closet for quite some time now: yee-haw!)

The most popular women’s boots include the Western, Ankle, Equestrian, Flat, and Knee Highs. There are variations of these styles in different materials, heel length and colors.

Women’s Jackets

Women’s jackets are found in many different styles and can help flatter your figure. After reading a Lucky Shopping Manual by Kim France and Andrea Linett, there were a few jacket tips I was able to find. There are blazers, which can help fill out sloped shoulders. Double pocketed or western styles can help enhance small bust area

and make shoulders look more narrow. Wrap around jackets accommodate busty figures and help shape a straight/athletic body frame. Lastly, a bomber jacket helps create a waist and shorten a long torso.

My personal choice of jackets this season are leather and faux fur jackets. I will be layering my outfit this weekend with a cropped leather jacket and faux fur bomber jacket. When wearing a leather or faux fur jacket, I feel like it is so versatile, and it can add a statement look to any wardrobe. Layered over denim, dresses, or leggings, these types of jackets are bold pieces that add character and style to a plain outfit.

Animal Print Dresses

I’m getting ready for a much deserved weekend getaway…I’ll be going to Sin City: Las Vegas for a good friend’s birthday celebration. It is inevitable that I will pack something with animal print. I know… animal print is everywhere, but this print has been my fav. before it hit the masses. Since Betsey Johnson circa 80’s styles, I have made animal print a part of my lifestyle. Whether it is on my clothes, on my area rugs, or on my cell phone case, animal print keeps me comfortable in my own skin.

Fergie wears a multicolored dress with big prints. The dress itself is edgy and provides a more youthful look. The print is larger in size, showing she wants to stand out from the rest of the crowd (most of us can’t pull off a large print without looking like a piece of upholstery). Since the print is magnified, she styles her dress with a blazer to show she is a mature professional. Also, the blazer adds more dimension to her figure creating more focus on her curves, rather than the dress.

Paris Hilton wears her traditional animal print in a refreshing color combo. The dress silhouette is a classic wrap dress with collar and feminine neckline; which makes her look like she wants to be taken more seriously (yeaah right!!). Although the dress is a more sophisticated cut, the print makes it look more modern and chic. This is a flattering cut for all body types, whether you are petite or curvy.

Kim Kardashian wears a more abstract version of the animal print. The print layout elongates the figure and gives it a contemporary look. Her party dress has 3/4 sleeves and is fitted at the waist. This body style is flattering for those that want to hide heavy arms or to balance bottom heavy figures.

Relationship

Interpersonal Relationship

An interpersonal relationship is an association between two or more people that may range from fleeting to enduring. This association may be based on limerence, love and liking, regular business interactions, or some other type of social commitment. Interpersonal relationships take place in a great variety of contexts, such as family, friends, marriage, associates, work, clubs, neighborhoods, and churches. They may be regulated by law, custom, or mutual agreement, and are the basis of social groups and society as a whole. Although humans are fundamentally social creatures, interpersonal relationships are not always healthy. Examples of unhealthy relationships include abusive relationships and codependence.

A relationship is normally viewed as a connection between two individuals, such as a romantic or intimate relationship, or a parent-child relationship. Individuals can also have relationships with groups of people, such as the relation between a pastor and his congregation, an uncle and a family, or a mayor and a town. Finally, groups or even nations may have relations with each other, though this is a much broader domain than that covered under the topic of interpersonal relationships. See such articles as international relations for more information on associations between groups. Most scholarly work on relationships focuses on romantic partners in pairs or dyads. These intimate relationships are, however, only a small subset of interpersonal relationships.

Love

Love is any of a number of emotions related to a sense of strong affection and attachment. The word love can refer to a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes, ranging from generic pleasure ("I loved that meal") to intense interpersonal attraction ("I love my husband"). This diversity of uses and meanings, combined with the complexity of the feelings involved, makes love unusually difficult to consistently define, even compared to other emotional states.

A fascinating study by researchers at the University College London, University of Warwick and London School of Economics and Political Science shows that a longer courtship before mating allows a male to show that he is "good" from the female's point of view ("goodness" is defined as his willingness to care for young after mating). The study used game theory to analyze the male/female dating game. According to the researchers, a longer courtship shows that the males who are more available for lasting and true love relationships were willing to wait and delay having sex. They consider these subjects to be "good men" from the women's point of view.

I love this study!! It is not only funny in its use of value-laden terms of "good" and "bad" (by a mathematician and economist no less) but it is totally in line with the Dating Program I describe in my dating advice book, Love in 90 Days: The Essential Guide to Finding Your Own True Love. My students (of all ages) who are having great success in finding lasting and committed relationships are casually dating a few guys and not having sex with any of them at the outset (a little kissing and canoodling is OK). This engenders respect for the woman and tends to protect her from getting hurt by a guy who is only after sex.

On my dating program it is only after at least two months of consistently improving contact that the women consider dating a fellow exclusively and possibly having sex with him. Over the course of these two months, there should be more sharing of friends, family and personal space, as well as feelings and thoughts. True love comes from having a best friendship along with chemistry. So waiting is a good thing.

Oh, and by the way, the longing for each other and anticipation usually make the sex itself, once it happens, all the more sweet, meaningul and fantastic!!



Love

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Relationship

Christmas Holiday

• History of Christmas holiday

Christmas has had a long and varied history. It has been celebrated for centuries by different people, at different times, in different places, and in many different ways. Here you will find links to information about the different ways that the holiday we know as Christmas has been celebrated, or not celebrated, over the years.


Christmas is both a sacred religious holiday and a worldwide cultural and commercial phenomenon. For two millennia, people around the world have been observing it with traditions and practices that are both religious and secular in nature. Christians celebrate Christmas Day as the anniversary of the birth of Jesus of Nazareth, a spiritual leader whose teachings form the basis of their religion. Popular customs include exchanging gifts, decorating Christmas trees, attending church, sharing meals with family and friends and, of course, waiting for Santa Claus to arrive. December 25–Christmas Day–has been a federal holiday in the United States since 1870.

• The history of Christmas trees

Christmas is the single most celebrated holiday in America. The time of year when we gather our friends and family together and engage in the giving of gifts, and in some cases, celebrate the birth of Christ
. Of course with this holiday comes the image of Christmas. The warm fires, sparkling lights, cold snowy evenings, and softly wafting music are all part of the Christmas image, but what Christmas would be complete without the main piece? The one thing that above all others says “Christmas!” is the Christmas tree!


One might wonder, why on earth do we celebrate Christmas with trees? Especially evergreen trees? After all, unlike the nativity scenes, doves, and angels, that may or may not be part of your town’s Christmas décor, trees are not especially Christian. One does not read the Christmas story as put forth by the New Testament and see any mention of trees.

The answer is surprisingly simple. Trees are the mainstay of the American Christmas experience because a very long time ago the Christians decided that they needed a more aggressive recruiting technique to generate more Christians. During the early days of Christianity
, while the faith was trying to spread from its base in the Mediterranean to the far reaches of Europe, the Christians noticed that it was easier to gain converts if they had holidays similar to those of the people they were trying to convert.

Thus, as missionaries wandered into the Pagan
wildernesses of what is now France and Germany they found people who celebrated the winter solstice. These Pagans believed that as the days got shorter the sun was going away, and if it did not come back, all of humanity would die. So out into the forest they would go in search of the largest living things they could find. The largest living thing was an evergreen tree, proof that life still existed even in the dark of winter. In addition to the great tree, the celebration to bring back the sun involved getting as much light as possible. So, a large fire burned non-stop while torches lit the homes of the pagans, and the living evergreens were decorated with lights to woo the sun back into existence.

After the early Christians spread to Rome they adopted December 25th as Christmas day to increase the probability of converting the believers of Mithras, a god of soldiers, sailors, and merchants, who celebrated his birthday on the 25th of December. Thus, it was not terribly difficult to show the natives to the north that they too had a winter solstice holiday. In an effort to be even more appealing to these Pagans, they to cut down large green trees and incorporated them into the worship of Christ.

By the Dark Ages Christianity was the prevailing religion
in what had once been Pagan territory, but the celebration of Christ’s birth with large green pagan trees continued. It became a revered tradition that was passed from generation to generation, and over time when waves of Germanic Christians came across the ocean in search of a new life in a new land, it came too. Thus, the celebration of Christmas with trees spread to the new world, where many were happy to see this beautiful custom and adopt it as their own.

Santa Claus:Is he a myth or a man? Could Santa Claus be an actual part of our history? There are many questions about the spirit know as Santa Claus. A child’s belief in this particular spirit is as strong as their belief in world happiness and peace. If we could look at Santa Claus through the eyes of a child, we would probably see a man who makes people all over the world happy. To a child, just the thought of Santa Claus could make them overcome with silliness and giggles. Santa Claus brings a special happiness to children and adults throughout the holiday season. The belief in one man delivering joy is strong enough to make some people forget their problems or anger and feel peace, even if it is just for one day.

Stories about a man called Santa Claus have been told throughout the years in different parts of the world. The story of Santa Claus supposedly originated overseas where a man named St. Nicholas would give candy and small toys to children each year on the night before Christmas. The children would leave their shoes out on their front porch and in the morning they would find their shoes filled with candy and toys. In the United States though, this spirit is known as Santa Claus. In other countries, Santa Claus is known by other names associated with the stories told in each country.

The basic myth about Santa Claus is this: on the night before Christmas, Santa Claus visits the homes of all of the good boys and girls. He leaves them presents under the tree and fills their stockings with goodies. When the children awaken, they find all of the gifts that Santa Claus has left them. Most children who know the tale of Santa Claus believe that if they are on their best behavior all year long then they will receive whatever gifts they ask for. Some even go as far as mailing a letter to Santa Claus containing their wish list of presents. They upon Christmas morning, they are surprised to open most of what they had asked for.

Most parents pass on the story of Santa Claus to their children from birth. Then their children grow up believing in the spirit of Santa Claus and pass it on to their children. Adults love to see the expression on their children’s faces as they see the presents under the tree on Christmas morning. It gives them a feeling of happiness.

That is why the spirit of Santa Claus lives on today and will probably continue throughout the ages. The belief in Santa Claus is that strong, especially among children. Adults might not necessarily believe in the man but they do believe in the spirit. To believe in Santa Claus is to believe in giving, love and unselfishness. Christmas time is the one time each year where almost everyone all over the world gives to one another. It is the season of unselfishness. So the spirit of Santa Claus is the spirit of love.

Extremely Funny

hey guys....m in funny mood today checkin out funny things on net..look what i got on http://www.lotsofjokes.com/funny_jokes.asp

An elderly woman went to her local doctor’s office and asked to speak with her doctor. When the receptionist asked why she was there, she replied, “I’d like to have some birth control pills.”

Taken back, the doctor thought for a minute and then said, “Excuse me, Mrs. Glenwood, but you’re 80 years old. What would you possibly need birth control pills for?”

The woman replied, “They help me sleep better.”

The doctor considered this for a second, and continued… “How in the world do birth control pills help you sleep?”

The woman said, “I put them in my granddaughter’s orange juice, and I sleep better at night.”

---

"Mister, why doesn't this cow have any horns?" asked the young lady from a nearby city. The farmer cocked his head for a moment, then began in a patient tone, "Well, ma'am, cattle can do a powerful lot of damage with horns. Sometimes we keep'em trimmed down with a hacksaw. Other times we can fix up the young 'uns by puttin' a couple drops of acid where their horns would grow in, and that stops 'em cold. Still, there are some breeds of cattle that never grow horns. But the reason this cow don't have no horns, ma'am, is 'cause it's a horse."

---

3 guys were riding in a car: a hardware technician, a systems analyst, and a programmer. The systems analyst is driving and when they come to a steep hill he finds that the brakes have failed and the car is accelerating out of control.

So, the driver pumps the emergency brake, downshifts the gears, and rubs the wheels' rims against the curb. He finally wrestles the car to a stop. The three climb out and assess the situation.

Hardware tech: "Let's try and fix it. I'll crawl under the car and take a look. "

Systems analyst: "No. I think we should get someone qualified to fix it, a specialist in brakes."

Programmer: "Why don't we just get back in and see if it happens again?"

---

"What time does the library open?" the man on the phone asked.
"Nine A.M." came the reply. "And what's the idea of calling me at home in the middle of the night to ask a question like that?"
"Not until nine A.M.?" the man asked in a disappointed voice.
"No, not till nine A.M.!" the librarian said. "Why do you want to get in before nine A.M.?"
"Who said I wanted to get in?" the man sighed sadly. "I want to get out."

---

One day, Satan was out for a walk through Hell, making sure things were running smoothly. When he got to the Lake of Fire, he saw a man sitting by the lake, relaxing in a lawn chair, and not sweating or looking uncomfortable at all. Perplexed, Satan approached the man and asked:

"Young man, are you not hot or bothered by this heat?" The man replied, "Oh no, not at all. I lived in downtown Toronto and this weather is just like a typical July day in the city." Satan thought that this was not a good sign, so he rushed back to his office and turned up the heat in Hell another 100 degrees. Satisfied with himself, he again returned to the Lake of Fire to check on the young man.

When he got there, the man was showing a few beads of sweat, but that was all. Again Satan asked the Torontonian, "Are you hot and uncomfortable yet?" The young man looked up and said, "No, the temperature is just like a hot August day in Toronto. I'm coping it just fine."

Satan decided that he had to do something drastic to make this man's stay in Hell unpleasant. He went back to his office, turned the heat all the way down, and then turned up the air conditioning. The temperature in Hell quickly dropped well below zero. As he approached the Lake of Fire, he noticed that it was now frozen over. He also saw the Torontonian jumping up and down wildly, waving his arms and yelling into the air.

"This looks promising!" thought Satan. Coming closer, he finally made out what the man was shouting: "The Leafs have won the Stanley Cup! The Leafs have won the Stanley Cup!"

---

An old farmer had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back forty, had it fixed up nice; picnic tables, horseshoe courts, basketball court, etc. The pond was fixed for swimming when it was built. One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end of the pond.

One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!" The old man replied, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim or make you get out of the pond, I only came to feed my alligators." Old age and treachery will triumph over youth and skill every time!

Merry Christmas

Hiiiiiiiii guys.....Merry christmas to all u wonderful ppl out der....
got funny stuff on christmas on http://www.ahajokes.com/qandac.html


What do elves learn in school?

A: The Elf-abet!

Q: What's the most popular wine at Christmas?
A: "I don't like sprouts" !

Q: If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?
A: Missletoe!

Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite.

Q: Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
A: Because he had low elf esteem.

Q: Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
A: So he can ho-ho-ho.

Q: Where do polar bears vote?
A: The North Poll.

Q: What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper?
A: Ribbon hood.

Q: Why do birds fly south for the winter ?
A: Because it's to far to walk.

Q: What was wrong with the boy's brand new toy electric train set he received for Christmas?
A: Forty feet of track - all straight!

Q: What kind of bird can write?
A: A PENguin.

Q: How does Al Gore's household keep Christmas politically correct?
A: On Christmas morning, they give the presents TO the tree.

Q: What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas time?
A: Sandy Claus!

Q: How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
A: Fleece Navidad!

Q: What nationality is Santa Claus?
A: North Polish.

Q: Why does Santa's sled get such good mileage?
A: Because it has long-distance runners on each side.

Q: What do you call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
A: Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!

Q: What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus?
A: Crisp Cringle.

Q: What did the ghosts say to Santa Claus?
A: We'll have a boo Christmas without you.

Q: What did Santa shout to his toys on Christmas Eve?
A: Okay everyone, sack time!!

Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A: Snowflakes.

Q: If Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus had a child, what would he be called?
A: A subordinate claus.

Q: Why did the elf push his bed into the fireplace?
A: He wanted to sleep like a log.

Q: Why did Santa spell Christmas N-O-E?
A: Because the angel had said, "No L!"

Q: What goes Ho, Ho, Swoosh, Ho, Ho, Swoosh?
A: Santa caught in a revolving door!

Q: Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?
A: Because it " soots " him!

Q: What do you do if Santa gets stuck in your chimney?
A: Pour Santa flush on him.

Q: Did you hear that one of Santa's reindeer now works for Proctor and Gambel?
A: Its true . . . Comet cleans sinks!

Q: What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
A: Claustrophobic.

Q: Why does Scrooge love Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?
A: Because every buck is dear to him.

Q: How come you never hear anything about the 10th reindeer "Olive" ?
A: Yeah, you know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"

Q: Why did the little girl change her mind about buying her grandmother a packet of handkerchiefs for Christmas?Q: Olive ?
A: Yeah, you know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"

Q: Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
A: You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

Q: Olive?
A: Yeah, you know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"

Q: What was so good about he neurotic doll the girl was given for Christmas?
A: It was wound up already.

Q: What's a good holiday tip?
A: Never catch snowflakes with your tongue until all the birds have gone south for the winter.

Being LOVEly

Hello friends,

Starting my blog today. Actually I was in search of topic for my first post.But couldn't find anything more interesting than LOVE. I don't think anybody would be able to define what is love. So no in trying that. Got better things to do!!! I found some interesting quizzes about love on a site...here is the link for you.

http://www.funquizcards.com/quiz/love-dating/

I tried The soulmate quiz and my result was " You are soulmates - truly made for each other." So I am happy.

Also I got "You are a big flirt. You know the tricks of the trade" this as a result of Test your flirting style quiz.
Some more funny quizzes are there on this site...some of my favourites are...

• Are you a desirable date?
• Do you make a good impression on your date?
• Is your girlfriend cheating on you?
  

Check out these and tell me your result friends....m signing off for now..
Bye